Sunday, 12 June 2011

Married part Two

Waking up the morning of my wedding I had a bath(with bubbles) and prepared a cereal breakfast for my best man(still my guest, rules of hospitality always apply!). Unsurprisingly I had no appetite. We donned our suits and he, having trouble with his cravatte offered me assistance with mine "they are tricky buggers to put on, let me sort yours out".

Later that day, just before the ceremony I had my chat with the registrars, during which I explained that I was legally and physically fit to marry under the laws of the united kingdom. One question that amused me as all anachronisms do - "are you free born and a citizen of the United Kingdom?". Fortunately in this day and age I was not born a slave......strange question!

Shortly after this I was stood in the hall, the majority of my guests sat before me and my best men stood beside me. At this point I should stress that the temperature when leaving my house was twenty-eight degrees, that was at half past nine, it was now midday, as people piled into the small room the temperature steadily climbed to what was apparently my melting point. On occasion a guest would arrive late, the music would stop as the door opened, when realising it wasn't my bride the music restarted. After the fifth time this happened my nerves were shot. Eventually the bridal party arrived at the door, headed by our reluctant page boy.

When I caught sight of my near-wife I became breathless, as she walked towards me and stopped beside me I became aware of the registrar saying something. I still have no idea what it was, my entire universe was focused on how incredible the woman beside me looked. I know it sounds cliche and because of the cliche I thought I was equipped to deal with the situation.....I wasnt.

Before the ceremony formally started my best men took their seats and a very dear friend stood. She was shaking uncontrollably in front of seventy odd people. However her voice rang out beautifully as she delivered our chosen reading. Shakespeares sonnet 116,  I know its well used but I like it and the friend delivering it has a voice of pure fragile beauty perfectly suited for this one task.

"Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved."

She delivered this not just in pure, clean, crystal clear english. But also in perfect Iambic pentameter. No small feat when suffering severe stage fright. 

The rest of the ceremony took place with ....minimal tears. Once it was all done we all retreated to the lawn for photos. At which point my wife told me that my cravatt was the wrong way around(thank you best man). A small point which NO-ONE else picked up on but which she is clearly never going to let me forget. A great number of photographs were taken in various places. Bubbles were used in the place of confettii as we were in the New Forest and it seems they get a bit shirty about people throwing loads of paper around. We then formed a recieving line and greeted all of our guests into the hall for the wedding breakfast(a massive lunch). My brain was struggling to keep up with the ettiquette as person after person appeared in front of me (do I know this person well enough to hug? is a handshake appropriate.....AHHHH!). After more hugs, kisses and handshakes than I care to remember we were introduced to the room as "Ladies and Gentlemen, please be upstanding for the new Mr and Mrs ******". We were then walked into the room and to our seats via the long route. Orders for the starters were taken and these incredible little plates were placed in front of us, I chose the was a good choice. When main course food was ready we were taken up by the staff, they asked us what we wanted and collected it on a plate, and carried it with us back to our seats(I could get used to this). At this point we were all fairly well plied with wine and it was obvious in the room it was having good effect as a social lubricant. The guests then went up for food, surprisingly for both families not one person complained about the food(it was that good). After a number of speaches(my best mans going down in infamy). We exited the room and everyone was given time to relax before the reception. I took this time to investigate my room and have a shower. As it turns out my room was bigger than my house and I got a little lost inside it. The shower was much needed. I got back into my suit and found myself at the bar with a double straight GlenMorangie(my favourite whiskey).

I sedately socialised with friends and family and greated friends as they arrived for the reception. 

This is a good place to end part two. 

Lessons from this part - Never trust another man to dress you. Your best mans speech will almost always beat yours, In extreme times of dire need your family may behave themselves.

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